Erik came across an article that talked about scientists expanding lifespans to 140 years of age. The article, found on msnbc.com, reported: "Whether through genetic tinkering or technology that mimics the effects of caloric restriction — strategies that have successfully extended the lives of flies, worms and mice — a growing number of scientists now think that humans could one day routinely live to 140 years of age or more." This, of course, had Erik dreaming of the possibilities of breaking records in the Guinness Book of World Records with his Bronco and Torino...

Erik: Can you imagine putting up with me for 110 years? And how hard would it be to find parts for the Bronco which would be a 100 year old?

Stacey: God, that's a scary thought...

Erik: I can see it now...

[*Entering dream state*]

Stacey: "Mumble, mumble, mumble"

Erik: "What?!"

Stacey: "Get a hearing aid! I have been telling you that for over a century!"

Erik: "Whatever! You mumble! Anyway, I am going into the garage to work on the Torino. I should be able to get it done before close of century."

Stacey: "Right! You have been saying that even before our first flying car! And when are you going to get rid of that Bronco? They don't even sell gas anymore!"

Erik: "Well, I have made my own gas out of household cleaners. It is...mostly safe."

Stacey: "So that is that smell coming from the garage? I am calling the disintegration company and asking them to come get that rusting hunk of metal!"

Erik: "But Jake thinks its cool. Right, Jake?"

Jake: "Actually Dad, as President of the US and Mexican States, excluding Massachussetts, you are an embarrasment to my administration, Dad. If it were not for my half sister and five time Nobel Prize winner Shawna, this family would be a total embarassment. And Dad, all the members of GWAR were killed in the great Justin Timberlake Metrosexual uprising. Stop wearing their concert T-shirts. No one cares about your classical music anyway these days. Get with the program! Britney Spears IV and the two-headed clone of Kelly Clarkson are what is cool now. Well, I can't stay long, I am going on a tropical vacation in Antarctica. But first, I have to go by my office to nuke Massachussetts."

Erik: "What? Quit mumbling!"

Stanley VII: "Jake is not mumbling, you two-legged twit. I wish you humans had never made super intelligent dogs, that way I would not have to listen to the endless prattle that comes out of your mouths..."

Stacey: "When are WE going on a tropical vacation to Antarctica?"

Erik: "What? Quit mumbling!"

Erik Lloyd
Created: 05/26/06